Sir Paul
Senator / Director of the Pacific Press
This is PNN
Posts: 617
|
Post by Sir Paul on Mar 18, 2004 17:10:48 GMT -5
FRANCOS SPAIN MOST POPULAR LEADER ON EARTHFranco (center) waves at the adoring masses during a parade spontaneously thrown in his honorFrancos Spain, The Pacific: It is official. With 512 endorsements, Francos Spain is the most endorsed man in NationStates. Millions cheered as celebrations sprang up all over the Pacific. Since he was asked to personally appear at 7,214 events across the region to mark the occasion, Franco was kind enough to send out his body doubles, so that every nation can bask in the presence of his greatness. “Much the way Santa can appear in every mall in the region, so can I” the beaming leader proclaimed. The enemies of the realm, however, were dismayed. Former endorsement leader and demagogue tyrant of the North Pacific Wilkshire expressed deep sadness and frustration at Franco’s success. “Even if every UN nation that supports me were to invade the Pacific, it still wouldn’t be enough. My dreams of conquering the Pacific and forming a grand alliance with Crazy Girl are all for nothing. *sigh*” Wilkshire then proceeded to cry, watch Lifetime, and eat 1 gallon of Ben and Jerry’s Ice Cream. Talk about your Chunky Monkey. www.imgspot.com/uploads/wilk_hobo.jpg[/img]An unkempt, disheveled Wilkshire after hearing the newsThese new revelations are proof that the glory that is the NPO shall shine forth from this great land forever, and having the world's most power delegate bodes well for not only the people of the Pacific, but for all mankind. With attempts to take over the Pacific all but abandoned, many regions are laying down the sword and approaching with an olive branch. If you can’t beat the most popular delegate in the world, you might as well join him, or at least come over for afternoon tea.
|
|
Sir Paul
Senator / Director of the Pacific Press
This is PNN
Posts: 617
|
Post by Sir Paul on Apr 2, 2004 23:01:13 GMT -5
FRANCOS SPAIN RECOGNIZED BY EAST PACIFIC www.petermax.com/bio/left/peace_accord.jpg[/img]1 Infinite Loop (left) shakes hands with Francos Spain (right) in the historic peace accordNPO Forums, The Pacific: On March 29th, 2004, 10:07 pm PST, the nation of Packilvania heralded the news that the East Pacific had officially recognized El Caudillo as the legitimate ruler of the Pacific. This event has left the NPA, the FFA, and the RRA as some of the few last hold-outs on recognizing the government. It is suspected that these latest overtures comes from the growing relation South Pacific Delegate LadyRebels has had with several NPO members. With his mistress having so much fun, it would be unreasonable to expect 1 Infinite Loop to maintain a hard-line stance. www.strokersdallas.com/Events/EventPics/HawgWild03/Img_4854.jpg[/img] The Queen of LadyRebels (center) at Abysseria’s 10 day Meritocracy Party. Lower Left: Abysseria and Francos Spain cheer the Queen on.The tide of tolerance is sweeping across nationstates, and even traditional Anti-NPO news organizations are admitting that the NPO is here to stay. Despite this, there are some who still oppose the NPO, which has guided the Pacific for 7 months. The Twoslits Experiment, of the North Pacific oligarchy, gave this speech before his oppressed subjects: “We shall go on to the end, we shall spam them in their T-gram inbox, we shall pester them on The Pacific and NetWorkRadio forums, we shall spread lies and slander with growing confidence and growing strength in the Nationstates forums, we shall defend our government, whatever the cost may be. We shall eject NOOTROUGHSIS on the beaches, we shall eject SLR on the landing grounds, we shall eject those who challenge me in the fields and in the streets, we shall eject them in the hills; we shall never stop, and even if, which I do not for a moment believe, this region or a large part of it were warned or deleted for spamming and flaming, then our Empire beyond the seas, armed and guarded by our puppet governments, would carry on the struggle, until, in God's good time, the YoungWorld, with all its power and might, steps forth to the rescue and the liberation of the old Pacific.” At the prodding of bayonets, the populace spontaneously erupted with mediocre applause. Fortunately, those who subscribe to TwoSlits’ philosophies are in a growing minority, and the shifting winds of inter-regional politics are aligning themselves behind the sails of the New Pacific Order.
|
|
|
Post by BertramStantrous on Apr 8, 2004 3:45:47 GMT -5
Nationstates mourns the loss of academic scholarThe coffin of "gettersburg" at his funeral procession.The Nationstates community is in mourning today after losing one of the most intelligent members of its flock the other day. The nation "gettersburg," also known as "kane," leader of the region "New Destryer," merged with the infinite yesterday. Apparently, for the last 28 days, he'd been trying unsuccessfully to log in to his nation, but just couldn't spell it properly. After his nation finally ceased to exist, gettersburg apparently tried to have his nation resurrected by the mods, but they misunderstood his message, and accidentally resurrected the nation "gaytopia." The mistake was regrettable. "I'll remember him for his kindness, his incredible brain power, and his coherency, not to mention his incomparable spelling abilities." said long time friend and drinking buddy Francos Spain. "Reading his posts was like reading poetry. It reminded me of James Joyce's work in Finnegan's Wake. Such lines as 'how is ever one form her on would iam giveing the un leader power to protect you all as iam tied up with my main nation it you show matthoytania and harod i can be contact my lady kitty how has none me a long time or Mordithia good luck boys' just haunt me in a way I cannot describe." Here is one of gettersburg's final posts: " it time two pick this region up ever one start recruiting plese and suport you un delegate matthoytania if you would need me iam going to tel-gram you my main nation kane " Gettersburg's legacy, however, lives on. His region, New Destryer, has achieved a record 4 nations since its founding, and is expected to rise to 5 by the end of June of this year.
|
|
|
Post by Praetor on Apr 10, 2004 5:09:57 GMT -5
|
|
Piophilia
Liege
Let's get those missiles ready to destroy the universe!
Posts: 48
|
Post by Piophilia on Apr 14, 2004 1:02:59 GMT -5
Gettersburg Raised From the DeadAbove: The once-dead Gettersburg clawing his way out of his shallow grave by the highwayChgolpmdfrg City, New Destryer: Due to a shocking turn of events, the famed celebrity and scholar Gettersburg (AKA "Kane," AKA "Stromglave", AKA "Retarded Lab Monkey") has risen from the dead. "I was just taking one of my regular twilight strolls down an abandoned stretch of interstate when I saw Gettersburg, moaning and drooling, crawl out of a ditch and start lurching towards me." stated a flustered LadyRebels to Piophilian reporters. "Nothing seemed out of the ordinary at first, I thought he was just trying to collect endorsements. However, I was tipped off that something must be wrong when I noticed that he was actually wearing shoes and a tie. I screamed and tried to run, but I tripped and fell after only a few steps, tearing my dress and revealing soft, supple skin and ample bosom. Luckily for me, I was saved at the last minute by none other than Francos himself, wielding a twelve gauge shotgun and a chainsaw arm. " While over fifteen shots were fired, the lack of a head shot allowed the late Gettersburg ample time to escape. "I woulda finished him off, but I was... distracted. Francos was gettin himself a little sugar, if ya know what I mean!" stated a distracted Francos Spain at the scene of this freak occurance. A victorious Spain revels after his victory over deadite GettersburgWhile the reason for the re-animation of Gettersburg's corpse is a bit foggy, experts believe that he may be seeking revenge for past misdeeds. "Well, his last will and testament was completely incomprehensible; something about 'grebm n lifsavg 2 althe hppiki tensorph mtspluttgrphmadad.'" said a nervous Mordithia, Gettersburg's sole heir and 50% of the population of New Destryer. "So, we did what we only assumed he would have wanted; we just took all his assets (7 pesos, a pair of gloves with the letters L and R stitched into them, safety scissors, and a handkerchief hat), wrapped him in newspaper, and buried him in a shallow grave next to the highway. I bet I get all the blame for this re-animation business, but what else were we supposed to do?" However, Dr. Jergens of Pepsi-SafeCo University (formerly MIT), has a different hypothesis. "The whole revenge theory only works with ghosts, not zombies. Duh. Its obvious that this is the work of aliens attempting to destabalize the human race by ressurecting the dead." While there is solid evidence of at least four other alien attempts to destabilize the planet Earth, skeptics believe the number is likely double that, making this plan the 9th in a wicked, yet ill-concieved set of attempts to conquer the planet. Locals are strongly urged to lock their doors and securely fasten all garbage can lids in order to prevent any Gettersburg attacks until local Zombie-Control has the situation completely under control.
|
|
Sir Paul
Senator / Director of the Pacific Press
This is PNN
Posts: 617
|
Post by Sir Paul on Apr 15, 2004 1:52:06 GMT -5
Wilkshire Resigns From North Pacific Delegacy[/b] www.mongiello.org/images/Nixon.jpg[/img]Wilkshire (center) steps down as The Twoslits Experiment (right) awaits to be reinstatedWilkshire, The North Pacific: After two months as delegate/tyrant of the North Pacific, Wilkshire has decided to relinquish his throne of power. Wilkshire noted that “I can’t take the pressure! Ahhh! Too much pressure! NPO, AA, NPA, RRA, ADN. I can’t do it anymore. I need coffee! Ahhh!” Wilkshire can now be reached at Hells Pass Hospital, where he is being treated for Irritable Bowel Syndrome caused by massive stress. The Twoslits Experiment, although no stranger to being a tyrant, notes that he is “disappointed” in taking the reigns of power. Despite loosing approximately 100 endorsements during his reign as a tyrant, having the second most endorsement will enable him to become the unquestioned ruler once again. Twoslits thoughts on the subject: “Absolute Power corrupts absolutely, and I admit it, I’m one corrupt SOB.” The transfer of power will not be without its mystique, as there is a challenger in the midst. While Twoslits has 366 endorsements, Blackshear has 340. Many North Pacificians remember Blackshear as an outside fighting to give the delegacy a fresh face. Twoslit’s believed there needed to be a changing of the guard so bad that he actually placed an add in the world factbook entry asking people to endorse this maverick outsider in no way affiliated with the Wilkshire/Twoslits oligarchy. Perhaps with the backing of the ruling class, Blackshear will be able to get enough endorsements to get rid of the ruling class and put a brand new face on the politics of nationstates.
|
|
Piophilia
Liege
Let's get those missiles ready to destroy the universe!
Posts: 48
|
Post by Piophilia on Apr 15, 2004 2:37:31 GMT -5
Mussolandia wins Francos Spain Look-Alike ContestFrancos Spain (left) accompanied by look-alike Mussolandia (right) at the grand opening of NPO's first WalmartSpainingrad, NPO: Thousands cheered today as NPO nation Mussolandia was voted as being best Francos Spain look-alike by a panel of NPO senators at today's "Its good to be us" rally in downtown Spainingrad. After enduring torturous months of endless auditions, mail in photos, and kissing-contests, senators Unlimited, Bertram Stantrous, and Sir Paul were finally able to agree upon a satisfactory Francos body-double. "Not only is this yearly audition a fun way to keep up the spirits of our great nation, but it also serves the purpose of replacing the body-doubles that are mistakenly assassinated every year by anti-Francos radicals." stated a proud Spain from an armored glass bubble at todays opening ceremony. "I'd also like to mention that Mussolandia is available for Birthday parties, bar mitzvahs, grand openings, and more. Just call 1-800-RENT-A-FRANC." One of Mussolandias first duties as official Francos spain look-alike will be to join up with eight other body-doubles and join the real Francos during next week's fifth annual "Stop Trying to Kill Me" Parade. Above: Francos Spain (left) rides with Mussolandia (right) so as to confuse any would-be assassins"This is just so exciting! When I get in the costume, its like I AM Francos Spain!" stated an elated Mussolandia at a press conferance today. "It hasn't even been one day, and I've already been telegram spammed twice, recieved 50 endorsements, and gotten three threats from the mods!" In unrelated news, Mussolandia has been accused of treason and been threatened with banishment by the senators for breaching the 40 endorsement cap. His trial is to be held next month.
|
|
|
Post by mussolandia on Apr 16, 2004 18:48:49 GMT -5
|
|
|
Post by BertramStantrous on Apr 20, 2004 22:29:11 GMT -5
Mussolandia spends way too much time on insulting web pageBertram Stantrous (adorned with his stylish gold Rolex) flipping off his monitor.Bertram Stantrous' House: Bertram Stantrous is in shock today after viewing a link to a web page posted on the NPO forums by local degenerate, Mussolandia. The page is said to have caused Stantrous to vomit, give his monitor the finger, and make a caustic post in the Tabloids section of the same forum. "What the hell is with this web page?" asked Stantrous, keeled over a toilet bowl. "First of all, he posted a link to his web page. Why couldn't he just have posted the stuff on the forum directly? Did he know that he could do that? It's a lot easier that way, you know." When asked what exactly was wrong with the web page, Stantrous responded, "Well, look at those little beer things. What the hell? Also, his Photoshopping skills are obviously lacking. He just blurred out Neestro's eyes. He didn't even get rid of the text at the bottom. Plus, don't get me started on his choice of page layout. It looks like it says 'HE HIM IS NOT.' Nice one." Stantrous added, "Francos does not look like the real Francos, okay? Francos has looked like Mussolini for a lot longer than Mussolandia has, and now he wants to come around and change Francos' image 'just because?' He can't do that!" When asked about his page, Mussolandia responded "That took me nine hours to create. Four of those hours involved searching the internet for just the right pictures to steal and just post on my website, without any modification at all! Also, I had to find a website that would translate English to Italian, and I kept getting these translation site with, like, foreign words, and I couldn't read them. Also, I couldn't figure out how to make animated gifs, so I had to just steal one from somewhere. Do you know how hard it is to make those things? You have to, like, get this program. It sucks." It is not known whther or not Mussolandia will make another web site, but sources say that it will probably make fun of Bertram Stantrous.
|
|
Piophilia
Liege
Let's get those missiles ready to destroy the universe!
Posts: 48
|
Post by Piophilia on Apr 21, 2004 2:55:08 GMT -5
BERTRAM STANTROUS KICKS MUSSOLANDIA IN THE NUTSBertram Stantrous (left) firmly planting his left foot into the groin of Mussolandia (right)Duce City, MUSSOLANDIA: In an un-expected political endeavor which shocked and appalled millions of citizens of the NPO today, Senator and Director of the Secret Police Bertram Stantrous proceeded to firmly drive the steel tip of his shoe into the soft tissue of Mussolandia's genitals. "It was awesome!" stated a shocked passer by. "This dude was just, like, trying to unlock his car when this other guy just jumped outta (sic) nowhere and just NAILED him, like, five times in the crotch!" While early reports are not definite, it seems that there is more to this attack then originally expected. "The initial evidence recovered by forensics is quite shocking." states officer Clive Gorsky. "Judging by the sizable mound of fast food wrappers and sandwich-bagged feces, I would say that Stantrous was laying in wait for his victim for a number of days. This is beginning to look more and more like a planned attack." Sources indicate that the reason for ambivalence between the two nations may be the result of a light-hearted regional address given by Mussolandia last week concerning the heated issue of how our beloved leader Francos Spain is to be represented in the media. Following this address, Mussolandia proceeded to guzzle alcoholic beverages and spout Italian gibberish before passing out in a pool of his own fluids. While many were caught off guard by this vicious display of violence, political analyst Benjamin Hurtz provides his theory on the motives behind today's seemingly un-provoked high-balling. "Not to point fingers, but there are a number of records that indicate that Mussolandia was fully aware of the threat to its testicles months in advance, but chose to ignore the warning signs. I even suspect that members of foreign ball-kicking cells were trained in the controversial Ball-Kicking School of Mussolandia. However, due to a terribly convoluted beurocracy and a woeful lack of attention to national security, Mussolandia was a prime target for the preventable attacks which took place this afternoon."
|
|
|
Post by mussolandia on Apr 21, 2004 10:16:01 GMT -5
BERTRAM STANTROUS HOSTS CRIMINALAbove: one of the latest pictures of the famous delinquent New Stantrous City, Bertram Stantrous: The Pacific has been shocked by Senator Bertram Stantrous’ decision to grant asylum to one of the greatest shape-shifter criminals of the latest 20th Century. Michael Jackson has been named “guest of honour” in the government residence, where he spends days and (especially) nights enjoying the various attractions that the members of cabinet and the head of state have to offer. The decision has been surprisingly applauded by many Stantrousian hard-liners: “You can’t have so many hard-on policies with this fellow. Sometimes regulations have to be bent over so that we put on our behinds the mistakes of the past”, said notable political analyst Gaylord M. Phillips (he also added “just call me Greg”). Mr. Stantrous had authorized covert operations against the proud state of Oklahoma, alleged home of many homosexuals and had thus earned an unofficial reputation as “The Pacifican Gay Basher”. This is therefore a dramatic turn of events, but by no means a turn-off for the Senator: “Oh, I just love him”, he cried while imitating the criminal, “he has revived the child that laid dormant in me and has awakened him into full bloom”. “He just tucks me to bed at night and strokes me and…” (official government censorship). The government is preparing to name Mr. Jackson “Minister of Child Entertainment”. There has been no public debate about the issue, since most people in this country can’t even put a sentence together (Bertram Stantrous often leads U.N. reports on “Stupidest Citizens”). This has brought to the attention of the press, and these are only conjectures, that Mr. Stantrous’ defaming of Gettersburg is either a futile attempt to cover the evident intellectual problems of his own people or a childish quarrel between alleged brothers. Mussolandia has redoubled border patrols, as the promiscuous felon has promised to spread his word of "peace" to other nations. Above: Warrant issued by the Mussolandian Questura On a side issue, Mussolandian leader Il Duce has dismissed the possibility of an international plot against him and does not feel beleaguered. “I think we all feel very straight about this issue and generally about everything, unlike other Pacifican leaders”
|
|
Piophilia
Liege
Let's get those missiles ready to destroy the universe!
Posts: 48
|
Post by Piophilia on Apr 22, 2004 3:33:36 GMT -5
MUSSOLANDIA RETALIATES Above: Bertram Stantrous gazes disdainfully at the result of Mussolandia's recent attackBertram Stantrous’s Stately Manor, NPO: In retaliation for yesterday's now infamous ball-breaking, the nation Mussolandia has launched its first counter-attack on the nation of Bertram Stantrous. Unwilling to look weak in the face of terrorist attacks, Mussolandia has taken the next step in this escalating conflict by vandalizing Stantrous's front lawn with inflammatory signs, toilet paper, and a flaming bag of dookie. Despite a struggling economy as well as a number of recent tax cuts, Mussolandia went on to voice in his recent address to the press that retaliation was necessary to protecting the freedom of the nation and maintaining an image of strength and rugged manliness to the rest of the NPO. "(We) don't believe in defensive positions" stated Mussolandia at a press conference the morning soon following the attacks; "..and (we) will not be taken aback by (Bertram Stantrous)'s (vicious kicking of my testicles)." Political analysts are now attempting to predict what moves Bertram will take next. "Its possible that he will do nothing in response to today's ‘Operation Downy-Soft,’ though it is not likely." Stated Dr. Greemshaw Plankton, a political science professor at ST. Frampton University. "I predict that he will attempt to knife the tires of Mussolandia's car, pee in his swimming pool, or even kill Mussolandia's dog." In response to the retaliatory actions taken by Mussolandia, Bertram Stantrous was quoted as saying "Phhhht. What the hell? Damn neighbor kids are at it again." He then proceeded in attempting to wash away the toilet paper on his lawn with a garden hose, resulting only in the further embedding of the bathroom tissue into his prized magnolia bushes. "This is so annoying" continued a steaming Stantrous, tripping over a sign reading "BS stands for Bertram Stantrous" while attempting to retrieve his morning paper. "This is fu*expletive deleted*cking war!"
|
|
|
Post by BertramStantrous on Apr 22, 2004 22:12:38 GMT -5
Bertram Stantrous gets his life together, decides not to relieve himself of his own frustrations by battering others"I have found religion," says StantrousNew Pacific Order, Forums: Upon hearing the recent posts by Mussolandia, Bertram Stantrous, through a lot of soul searching, has decided to abandon his wicked ways, and has accepted the love of Jesus Christ into his life. "Mussolandia taught me the errors of my ways not only by making that post in the 'Responses to Tabloid Articles' section, but also by making that stupid joke about Michael Jackson and insinuating that I was gay. Because of him, I have found religion, and I am now filled with the love of Jesus Christ, our lord and savior." Stantrous said, standing in front of the Bertram Stantrous Church of Latter Day Saints. "Mussolandia was very convincing. I mean, some might say that his words were extremely hypocritical and stupid, but not me. It's perfectly natural to follow up on a post telling me not to lash out at others on this board with another post lashing out at me! I mean, how else would he alleviate his frustration against the world? By beating his girlfriend? Not likely." Stantrous now reads the Holy Bible 17 hours a day, when he isn't driving to and from church or reading another one of Mussolandia's shrill posts.
|
|
Sir Paul
Senator / Director of the Pacific Press
This is PNN
Posts: 617
|
Post by Sir Paul on Apr 28, 2004 0:27:01 GMT -5
The Pacific Defeats The North Pacific in Visalia Invitational [/b] www.fijlkam.it/images/estate/foto-judo.jpg [/img] Sir Paul (white) throws Blackshear (blue) with a drop-knee Tai O'toshiVisalia, “S”an Joaquin Province, The Pacific: On April 25, 2004, the Pacific Judo club took on the North Pacific Judo Club at the invitation of the Chuka Judo Yudanshakai. In the Gym the Boys and Girls club, Judokas from both regions met on the tatami of battle to defend the honor of their homeland. Here were the following divisions: Men’s DivisionBlack Belt Division, HW Francos Spain vs. Twoslits Experiment Black Belt Division, LW Poskrebyshev vs. Wilkshire Brown Belt Division, HW Sir Paul vs. Blackshear Brown Belt Division, LW InfernoIce vs. Nem White Belt Division, HW Bertram Stantrous vs. OP Arsenal White Belt Division, LW Mammothistan vs. Ban My Ass Women’s Division Brown Belt Division Unlimited vs. Ananke White Belt Division LadyRebels vs. Magicality The action was fast and furious from the first match, when LadyRebels trounced Magicality. The battle of the delegates was humorous, as Magicality ran circles around LadyRebels, trying to escape her clutches. However, after Magicality tripped over her own feet, the action moved to the mat. “My years of mud-wrestling really paid off when we got to the mat-work” a beaming LadyRebels announced after she held Magicality for 25 seconds, earning The Pacific an Ippon. Unlimited’s match went just as well, but for different reasons. Ananke put up more of a fight, but was disqualified with a Hansoku-Make for biting, scratching, and hair pulling. In men’s white belt action, Mammothistan took on the venerable Ban my Ass. Ban My Ass travels from region to region, trying to pick up the most banishments, and the Visalia Invitational was no different. After not bowing before going on the tatami, Ban My Ass then said many vulgar things to the referee, dishonoring both himself and the tournament. He was promptly given a Hansoku-Make, giving Mammothistan the win. Unfortunately for the Pacific, their wining streak was ended in the Bertram Stantrous / OP Arsenal match. Bertram, having recently found Jesus, has promised never bring violence against another person, and repeatedly turned the other cheek after being thrown several times. The match ended when OP Arsenal threw his second Wazari for an Ippon. The Brown Belt division went better for the Pacific, as InfernoIce beat Nem 4 seconds into the match. Nem went in for a foot sweep, but violently over-reacted, sweeping so hard that he threw himself to the mat. InfernoIce let out a “Ha” that was interpreted as a kiai by the judges, and was awarded the Ippon. Sir Paul vs. Blackshear was considerably a more exciting match. Neither judoka was able to throw for the first two minutes, but after a botched O Soto Gari by Blackshear, Sir Paul was able to counter with an Tai O'Toshi and received a Yuko. During the ensuing mat work, Blackshear ran off the mat, and disappeared. He later admitted that an outside party (his wife) hacked into his brain, and caused his to leave the tournament without his knowledge. After time expired, Sir Paul was awarded the victory, a rank promotion to Nikyu, and a Yuko for the Pacific. Late in the afternoon, the main event took place, the black belt division. The first event, Poskrebyshev and Wilkshire, had all the makings of a soap opera. Wilkshire took an early lead with several leg throws, getting two Kokas, a yuko, and a Wazari. 2:36 into the match, Wilkshire left himself exposed, and Poskrebyshev was able to throw in a choke and Wilkshire soon gave up. The final match of the day, Francos Spain vs. Twoslits Experiment, was broadcast live through-out the Pacifics, earning a 23 share. As the two competitors reached the mat, Twoslits knew that he had lost the tournament, but had one chance to save face for his region. The two foes immediately grabbed each other and went in for their respective throws. Twoslits went in for a Tomo-Nage, but Franco was to quick, and dodged to the right, leaving Twoslits on his back with a shit-eating grin on his face. Franco then descended for a mat hold, but Twoslits was too slippery and flip-flopped his way to freedom. Twoslits then attacked Franco’s character with a T-gram-Spam-Waza, but was blocked and countered with a Meri-tai-crocy. Franco then went in for a Nagi-Russki-Alliance, but Twoslits cleverly went into a Tai-cry-babobi. When time expired, both judokas had two Yukos and three Kokas. This meant that this would come down to a decision. The referee for the match was Neutered Sputniks, and the judges were Violet and ReploidProductions. In a typical mod ruling, Twoslits was given the victory with a vote of 2 to 1. Despite this questionable win, the Pacific won the tournament. As the agreement, the tournament trophy will spend 1/8th of the year in the South Pacific on LadyRebels mantle, next to her numerous wet tee-shirt contest trophies.
|
|
Sir Paul
Senator / Director of the Pacific Press
This is PNN
Posts: 617
|
Post by Sir Paul on May 25, 2004 19:26:57 GMT -5
GOVERNMENT OFFICIALS BAN ALL INDEPENDENT MEDIA[/b] img29.photobucket.com/albums/v88/newpacificorder/trashed_buildingA.jpg[/img] The Pacific Society of F.R.I.E.N.D.S. Headquarters exploded last night due to a “gas leak”Sir Paul, The Pacific: Senator Sir Paul announced today that all independent media in the Pacific would be silenced. The ruling comes after the controversial PSA #5 was broadcast by the Pacific Society of Free Regional Information for Educable Newly Designed States (F.R.E.I.N.D.S). The public service announcement was considered offensive by some, and counter to the atmosphere of welcoming and tolerance that the Pacific strives to achieve. “Yes, this may be harsh, but when Chosen Men went beyond the bounds of free speech, I felt it was necessary to have a proportional response.” Chosen Men feels that this is a gentile plot to control the media. “It is precedence that the media is controlled by God’s ‘chosen people,’ and Sir Paul’s attempt to seize control is a direct violation of the order of nature.” Other media outlets were also flabbergasted. Bertram Stantrous Press (BS Bugle) was also closed down. “I find this is unfair, because now that I have found Jesus, I hate God’s chosen people, too!” Other media moguls are vowing to fight back. PIOPHILIA, spelled in caps because his name is to be shouted from the rooftops, is funneling money into an underground new organization to “get the truth out about Sir Paul.” The new paper, The Red Dress Press will shout out the truth about Sir Paul, which, of course, is how he is a great man who is a visionary for the Pacific. Women want to sleep with him, men want to be him. The citizens of the Pacific look forward to having all information given to them filtered through the government, so that there will be no chance of them being offended by n00b bashing or Janet Jackson’s breasts.
|
|