Sir Paul
Senator / Director of the Pacific Press
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Post by Sir Paul on Jan 7, 2004 15:31:43 GMT -5
A NEW POWER IS RISINGThe Free Pacific Army’s failed invasion on The PacificUndisclosed Location, The North Pacific: Two great empires appear to be on a collision course, as The Theoretical Probability of The twoslit experiment has threatened to commit an act of war upon the Pacific. The world factbook entry states: Anyone who wants to wrap their fingers around the neck of Francos Spain, inform one of our regional officers or delegate types around here .... ANYONE WHO WISHES TO JOIN THE GOVERNMENT MUST PARTICIPATE IN THE REGIONAL FORUMS ..... To visit our regional forum: (copy and paste) s2.invisionfree.com/The_North_Pacific/index.php? ~~~ NOOTROUGHSIS I INTEND TO EJECT YOU.(Lengthy explanation soon in the forums.)(Forums can be read without joining.) Ever since the rise of the New Pacific Order, several world leaders have rejected this enlightened and stable empire, as it is an affront to the chaos that penetrates their regions. With the forming of an army against our region, the NPO has moved several puppet nations into the region to assay the threat. One command in deep cover has stated that “these men are more like rabid creatures; just empty shells of hate and malice.” With such passion directed at the institutions of our region, it is clear that this new threat must be deal with. In an interview with The twoslit experiment, he stated that “A new power is rising in The Pacifics! I am calling all armies of Nationstates unto myself. Once all power is drawn unto the dark lord, he shall strike, destroying the world of the NPO! North Pacifican-kind shall prevail!” Poskrebyshev, current UN Delegate of The Pacific and Prefect of the Praetorian Guards announced that he has no fear of the North Pacifican insurgency. “We have withstood attacks from the Pacific Army, the Free Pacific Army, the Rejected Realms Army, and we shall crush this attack before it is even noticed by our populace. The courage of the Pacific shall not fail today!” Pacific defenses are at the highest they have ever been, and the thousands of nations in the Pacific are sure to be ready to counter any assault. Whether this will be a coordinated, well thought-out attack or a series of bungled attempts at griefing will be found out if and when the attack comes.
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Sir Paul
Senator / Director of the Pacific Press
This is PNN
Posts: 617
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Post by Sir Paul on Feb 2, 2004 4:20:00 GMT -5
Mrs. Crazy Girl Goes to Washington web.mit.edu/scz/www/img/yip-2002/crazy-girl.jpg [/img] Crazy Girl (left) poses with political advisor The twoslit experiment (right). North Pacific, Nationstates Forums: There has been a recent outbreak of foreign agitators attempting to stir-up an anti-NPO mind-set in the general population of Nationstates. The most recent is North Pacific Tyrant and Delegate The twoslit experiment, who demanded that there be “free and open elections” in the Pacific, to be held in the Nationstates Forums. Despite the fact that Twoslit has excommunicated two nations for no other reason than getting too many endorsements, he clearly believes that Francos Spain is the monster. Twoslit remarked that “While Franco bans nations because they have names like ‘bitches n pimps’ and ‘anus lips,’ our enlightened region only bans people who threaten my delegacy!” He went on to endorse Crazy Girl as delegate of the Pacific, and promised the mobilization of his army if necessary. “Francos Spain has used force to take the delegacy! Now, we must use force to force him out and put in place an ally/puppet of mine who will force all those who oppose us out!” Crazy Girl said she was flattered to accept the nomination for Pacific Delegate. After losing the InfernoIce Caucuses to Francos Spain, an “objective” reporter from Network Radio asked it she would continue on to the Poskrebyshev Primary or if she would drop out. Her response sent shockwaves through Nationstates: “And you know something? You know something? Not only are we going to Poskrebyshev, we're going to Bertram Stantrous and Unlimited and Mammothistan and Sir Paul and Mars Sara! We're going to Abysseria and Azerbaijanistanialand and Tar A! And we're going to Lesser Cambodia and Thorin and TBAN and The Godly El Sabah Nur! And then we're going to Francos Spain to take back the Delegacy! AHHH-AHHHH!” When asked if she really was crazy, the candidate responded “That makes about as much sense as sending the Boston Pops to Bakersfield on an East-bound train with a gross of pickled herring!” Dennis Miller reportedly laughed. The odd thing about this is that the election has absolutely no bearing on life in the Pacific. Regardless of what Twoslit or Crazy Girl do, endorsements, not meaningless biased exercises matter.
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Post by The Godly El Sabah Nur on Feb 2, 2004 5:18:15 GMT -5
I know I'm not supposed to post here, but.................HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*falls down laughing*
BEST.....TABLOID.....EVER!!
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Sir Paul
Senator / Director of the Pacific Press
This is PNN
Posts: 617
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Post by Sir Paul on Feb 4, 2004 5:46:56 GMT -5
DISENCHANTED YOUTH TURN TO SUB-CULTURE Jonathan Stormont, lead guitar of Sir Paul punk band Wink-364Sir Paul, The Pacific: After two hours on stage at the historic Dionysus theatre without saying a remark, Jonathan Stormont steps to the microphone, breaks his silence, and utters 5 words that rocked a nation: “Don’t trust anyone over 30!” Despite unfettered economic growth, historic levels of educational funding, and unprecedented regional stability, more youths are turning away from society and immersing themselves in a subversive sub-culture that threatens the fabric of Pacific society. Instrumental Punk Music, or InPuMu as is the lexicon, has become a beacon for those who find their bourgeois existence of food, shelter and clothing unbearable. Inpumu disciple Sid Vicious claims that the pressures of school, parents, what video-games to play and what clothes to buy are too much for today’s youths. “Man, I can’t have my parents hassling me about responsibility. If I wanna snort cocaine off of a girl’s fake boobs while having unprotected sex, that’s my business! And they shouldn’t cut off my allowance [$300 US per week] if they don’t like the way I live. The establishment doesn’t want me to feel good on my own, cause if I do, then I don’t need the establishment!” The Inpumu lifestyle is destructive, unproductive, and short. These teens and twenty-somethings spend their time listening to music in their parent’s basements doing drugs and contracting diseases. They dress with Mohawks, leather, and have a cavalier attitude about the future. Productive members of society are scared. The Pacific Association of Retired Persons (PARP) President James G. Parkel worried about how this generation could support his generation. “I’m apart of the greatest generation, so I deserve free medicine, housing, Viagra, income, trips to Las Vegas and Atlantic City, hookers, vouchers at Country Kitchen Buffet, and anything else I can’t remember because of my dementia. These lazy bums won’t work which means they won’t be able to give me the lifestyle they own me!” Government officials are also concerned about this growing trend. Cardinal Timothy Lovejoy, Minister of Religion for Sir Paul, noted that “These ‘musicians’ encourage their fans to question government authority and they are attempting to turn the morality of this nation and region into that of a hedonistic hippy commune!” President Rembrandt Q. Einstein also had apprehensions about Inpumu. “Although there are no explicit lyrics, or lyrics of any kind, the derogatory comments made by these individuals on stage and on cable channel ‘Empty V’ encourage boat rocking, and that’s something we just can’t have.” Instead of thinking of themselves, parents are the ones that are truly worried about their children. One mother exclaimed “I can’t make my children stop! I’ve tried giving them more money, I’ve tried doing nothing, I’ve tried spending less time at home, and none of it works!” With the level of children smarting off to their parents reaching pandemic levels, something must be done. Wink-364 stated that they are in the business solely for entertainment, and if their fans “take it too far,” it is not their problem. If you wish to hear Wink-364’s latest single, Drunken Libel, it is available for download at www.2flashgames.com/f/f-548.htm. After the punk-o-matic has loaded, press the “load” button in the upper left-hand corner and paste the following code into the box. Press play and hear Inpumu corrupt the minds of the children. If you discover (or create) any other Inpumu, please post that subversive garbage in the general forum. --6-0---1---1-8888886-0---1-----2---2---2---1---2---9-0---1---2---2---2-9------------2---2---0---1-9---9---2---2-----0---0---2---9---a---c-0---0---0---0-----c----------------------------------7-7-7-7-8-4-4-1---1---7-7-7-8-a-0---1---4-5-7-8-3-a------------
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Sir Paul
Senator / Director of the Pacific Press
This is PNN
Posts: 617
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Post by Sir Paul on Feb 24, 2004 15:23:05 GMT -5
GOVERNOR CAMPAIGNS TAKE-OFF indianz.com/News/images/recalldebate092403.jpg [/img] Aronld Schwarzenegger (right) debates Sir Paul (left) for Governor of The Pacific’s 19th district (province ‘S’).Francos Spain, The Pacific – On February 22, 2004, Franco, the magnificent and beloved leader of The Pacific, announced that the largest expansion of the New Pacific Order would occur since the formation of the senate. Franco stated that “There are thousands of nations in the Pacific, and many nations who have served the NPO in the past can now further their service with a stint as governor of the provinces. We have always been cautious about expanding the government of the NPO for fear we would fall back into the age of chaos, but as we approach the 6th month anniversary of the NPO, and celebrate new interregional ties, the senate has found that the nations would benefit from having a governor to oversee them on a more personal level.” This announcement has sparked interest, as applications for governor’s seats are being filed in the senate chambers. Poskrebyshev was the first to file for governorship. When asked if this would detract from his duties as Grand Viceroy of the Pacific, Poskrebyshev stated that “this opportunity will enhance my abilities as a senator. Being the eyes and ears for a few hundred will better allow me to keep my common touch when I am making decisions for several thousands. Thus far, all of the applications are unopposed, except for the 19th district, or province ‘S.’ Arnold Schwarzenegger, an immigrant from Austria, is running against Pacific native Sir Paul. Schwarzenegger stated that he seeks the governor’s seat to “Clean up the Pacific. Business as usual is killing our region, and it’s time for a change. Things have gotten so bad with these career politicians that special interest groups control the Pacific, not the people.” When asked about his lack of experience in the public sector and how he could control one of the larger districts in the region, Schwarzenegger responded “If the pipes in your house are broken, ask yourself: Who put in these pipes? Plumbers! To fix the problem, you need someone who is not a career plumber. You need someone who has no idea about pipe fitting or construction codes. Maybe he would come up with a better solution, like no pipes!” Sir Paul appears unworried about his competition. “First off, the Pacific is about trust, and I don’t believe the people want a foreign devil running their district. Secondly, I’m sure they want someone who can pronounce the region correctly; this is the Pah-sih-fick, not the Pah-see-feek!” Schwarzenegger called upon Sir Paul to apologize for his statements “Just because I can’t speak English doesn’t mean I shouldn’t be able to run a province” remarked the candidate. Sir Paul stood by his personal attack: “Everything I’ve said is true. The only one who has lied is Mr. Schwarzenegger, who insists that I am beholden to special interests. I have plenty of money; I don’t need help from anyone, unlike some other candidates.” Mr. Schwarzenegger was unable to respond because he was in New York at a $500,000 per plate fundraiser. 216.239.57.104/search?q=cache:J_NQ6E2Edd4J:asia.news.yahoo.com/040205/ap/d80h91h00.html+Schwarzenegger+500,000&hl=en&ie=UTF-8 The NPO campaign contribution laws do not impact what occurs outside the borders of the Pacific. For better or for worse, these appointments are going to change the way the citizens interact with their government for a long time to come.
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Piophilia
Liege
Let's get those missiles ready to destroy the universe!
Posts: 48
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Post by Piophilia on Feb 26, 2004 4:05:15 GMT -5
PIOPHILIA RETURNSAbove: Citizens of the NPO rejoice at the triumphant return of Media-Mogul PiophiliaFrancton, NPO: The Pacific rejoiced today after the triumphant return of Piophilia, famed media-mogul and lettuce manufacturer. Piophilia makes its return after an extended period of confused silence. Despite a gloriously mediocre standing in the NPO, Piophilia suffered from a number of internal issues which eventually lead to its fall. Due to heated tensions between Piophila's radical left-wing government and the ultra-fascist Corn and Bean Growers Union, then President Whitey Creamgood stepped down from his position of power and left for parts unknown, plunging the citizens of Piophilia into chaos. Below: File photo of then-president Whitey Creamgood Following a mysterious period known only as "the languishing," Piophilia dissappeared from the map altogether, its 60 million citizens transforming into a roaming band of Gypsies and traveling Magicians. It was not until the bold movements of our present Dictator-for-Life Lidel Neestro that power was wrestled away from the Pacific hoardes, allowing the native Piophilians, once again, to have a homeland. As stated in his televised speach Tuesday, Presidente Neestro stated: "It was my intention to once again unite the peoples of Piophilia under one flag once again! In our absence, the NPO has remained regrettfully uninformed as to the crucial events on which our great union pivots! Today is a glorious day for everyone! All praise the NPO! Viva la Banjo! Free Toronto!!" Above: Most recent photo of the mysterious Lidel NeestroMore as this story develops
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Piophilia
Liege
Let's get those missiles ready to destroy the universe!
Posts: 48
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Post by Piophilia on Feb 26, 2004 4:45:27 GMT -5
Spain to Star in Digitally Re-Mastered Die Hard DVDAbove: Cover to digitally re-mastered edition of Die hard, starring the un-beatable Francos SpainHOLLYWOOD: After months of work, the new, digitally re-mastered DIE HARD dvd has finally been released by NPO studios. "I had a very special vision" states director John McTiernan in an interview with Glamourcube Magazine "..but at the time the original Die Hard was released, we simply did not have the technology to get the full effect I had intended. Plus, the studio was in a hurry to get the movie into theatres, so we were forced to cut a few un-finished scenes, such as the thrilling bagel-purchasing scene, or Alan Rickman's 8 minute strip-tease. However, with new leaps in CGI technology available, I wanted to release a re-mastered version with added special effects and cut scenes never before seen!" At this point in the interview, McTiernan became squeemish. "..Uuhhh, well, unfortunately, the studio which originally produced Die Hard has been co-opted by the NPO. As a result, our entire budget went into replacing Bruce Willis with a CGI rendering of Francos Spain. Also, the villian has been changed from Alan Rickman's character to a crude depiction of The Twoslit Experiment wearing a dunce cap and a huge handlebar mustache." When asked wether he would re-release Die Hard 2 & 3 to DVD, McTiernan was quoted as saying "Are you kidding? Those movies sucked balls."
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Piophilia
Liege
Let's get those missiles ready to destroy the universe!
Posts: 48
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Post by Piophilia on Feb 27, 2004 13:17:26 GMT -5
THE TWOSLIT EXPERIMENT: PUBLIC ENEMY NUMBER ONE An even-handed look at the North Pacific’s prominent figurehead Above: Photographs verifying the imminent danger posed by the blood-thirsty and potent threat to all that is sacred: The Twoslit ExperimentA spectre is haunting the NPO-- the spectre that is The Twoslit Experiment. All the powers of the Pacific have entered into a holy alliance to exorcise this spectre: Francos and Poskrebyshev, Senators and UN delegates, Savageland Radicals and Bertram Stantrous’s police-spies. Enemy to all that is honest, good, and decent, Twoslit (often called Mr. Bucky by his elitist coalition of oligarchic fascists) is the driving force behind the evil North-Pacific Juggernaut that threatens our way of life in the serene and harmonic New Pacific Order. Only too clear are his intentions to ransack the unsuspecting countries around him, pillage their granaries, and rape every single one of their women, which goes against the nationstates bylaw 2049.5 which states: “UN delegates are not to rape and/or pillage neighboring regions unless said action is called for by the region receiving rape and/or pillage, in which case, the region being raped/pillaged (henceforth known as “Party B”) is to send a formal notice of pillagement to a nationstates mod pointing out the raping/pillaging suspect (henceforth known as “Party Q”) so that the issue at hand can be examined and equal punishments delivered to Party F at a later date, pending recognition by parties L and 9.” All one has to do is look into the eyes of this monster to see his true evil. Observe the first picture on the left. Can you not see the hatred? The self-loathing? The frigid contempt for all humanity? Can such a being so evil even be considered a human being? Perhaps it would be better suited to refer to him as some sort of overlord of the 7 rings of hell, or, as I like to call him, the LORD OF THE RINGS? How about picture number two? Notice anything... awry? That’s right, there’s our old “friend” Twoslit on the right with none other then Captain evil himself: Paul McCartney! However, in order to actually have spoken with Mr. McCartney while he was still alive, Twoslit would have to have been born OVER 150 YEARS AGO! And since this exceeds the average human lifespan by OVER 100 YEARS, Twoslit must either be a long-dead figurehead being manipulated by his cohorts in a fashion similar to that implied in Steinbeck’s WEEKEND AT BERNIES, or else he is, in fact, NOSFERATU. As for the weapons of mass destruction, sources say that chances are very high that The Twoslit Experiment either has them, or is in the process of developing them with the intention of using them on his neighbors. Pre-emptive action must be sought immediately, and while my words may not reflect those of his honorable Francos Spain in any way, shape, or form, I can safely guess that as he reads this, he is no doubt shaking his head, pounding his fists, and shedding one single tear in sorrow for the travesty which I have just described! This is Piophilian Dictator-for-Life Lidel Neestro, bidding you all a fond adieu. Peace out!
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Sir Paul
Senator / Director of the Pacific Press
This is PNN
Posts: 617
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Post by Sir Paul on Feb 27, 2004 16:13:16 GMT -5
ELECTIONS TO TAKE PLACE IN NORTH PACIFIC www.imgspot.com/uploads/iraq_car22.jpg[/img]Official North Pacifican Ballot for the position of DelegateNorth Pacific Forums, Nationstates: Elections are currently underway for the largest region in Nationstates. The positions up for election are Military Mod, RP Mod, Entertainment/Games Mod, UN proposals Mod, Diplomacy Mod, UN forum Mod, and Off Topic Mod. Surprisingly, Wilkshire had no opposition on the March 3rd Ballot. When asked why his position as delegate was not up for election, he replied “My people love me, and there is no need to waste their time while they show their consensus for me!” The nobles surrounding Wilkshire nodded in agreement. Wilkshire had a busy week, as a new thread was added to the North Pacific’s Boards, “Our Ban List.” When asked to comment on why a region that proclaims free democracy would have a ban list, government spokesperson The Twoslit Experiment replied “You see, we have free and open elections. So open that we know who voted for who. That way, we can see who the subversives are. We only ban people who don’t vote the way we want them to. This ensures that democracy will continue in the region.” In one of the hotly contested contest for Military Mod, Nem, Ananke, and Tresville are competing for the two general positions. Ananke said in his reelection speech that “We have successfully intervened in four other regions delegate issues this year, and if you re-elect me, I promise to mobilize the North Pacific army more often to establish puppet governments throughout the world.” Ananke was not the only one competing for votes, as Wilkshire attempted to rally his base to defeat “Please torture me and kill my family.” To show that he has little regard for other regions and that his attention is fully focused on the domination of the population, Wilkshire banned Pacific Ambassador The Messanger of Nur. When asked to comment on the insult, Francos Spain stated “Bring ‘em on!” Here are the current exit polls for the delegate race: Wilkshire: 103% Torture and Death: 0% margin of error +/- 5%
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Sir Paul
Senator / Director of the Pacific Press
This is PNN
Posts: 617
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Post by Sir Paul on Mar 4, 2004 4:24:57 GMT -5
Media War Erupts as New News Outlet is Established 50,000 watts of truth broadcast from the Space NeedleSeattle, Washington: Beneath the rain-addled city, a beacon of hope and defiance sends its message throughout Nationstates; this is SeattleNews. While the media of Nationstates has long been anti-NPO, the demand for unbiased reporting became so great that Seattle Syndicated News SSN20 was bought-out by SeatleCorp, and had its programming changed to fair and balanced reporting of the facts. While still new, SeattleNews is increasing its ratings weekly. Even though media-conglomerate NetWorkRadio still controls most of the market, it is expected that SeatleNews will continue to make gains as they bring the news in an honest and forthright manner. This new style of reporting is a refreshing change from NetWorkRadio, who used their reporters as spies to try and topple the NPO. Francos Spain has issued a boycott of NetWorkRadio to help ensure the safety of the region. “These ‘objective reports’ have slandered the good name of the New Pacific Order, rabble rouse our enemies, and serve as a beacon for subversives to conspire against our region. The senate has ordered all government officials to restrain from giving interviews or intelligence to this motley crew.” Despite the boycott, NetWorkRadio is still broadcasting stories about the NPO. Their most recent story is a treatise on the NPO and its relations with the rest of NationStates. The first half is about how the NPO is continuing to gain influence, support, and recognition as a legitimate government. The second half was about how various subversives are planning to invade our region and thrust and unwanted delegate upon us. In contrast, SeattleNews has published two articles on the Pacific: one to commemorate our 6 month anniversary, and the other as a media history of the Pacific. This report clearly documents our rift with NetWorkRadio, and why the NPO must always stay vigilant against the slanderers of the world. If you wish to visits SeattleNews, they can be reached at www.freewebs.com/seattlenews/
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Sir Paul
Senator / Director of the Pacific Press
This is PNN
Posts: 617
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Post by Sir Paul on Mar 4, 2004 15:50:33 GMT -5
The NPO Celebrates the Decimation of the “5th Column” history.sandiego.edu/cdr2/WW2Pics/71610.jpg[/img]Franco looks on as dissidents are trucked off to the Rejected Realms Francos Spain, The Pacific: The New Pacific Order has always been surrounded by four columns of troops (North Pacific, Freedom Fighters, Rejected Realms Army, and West Pacific) but there has always been a fifth column within the boarders of the Pacific. These subversives spread their poison throughout the region, sneaking from the shadows, attempting sedition and sabotage. Today, delegate Franco has declared that the NPO has been cleansed of such traitors. Before the senate, Franco announced that “We have worked long and hard to rid ourselves of the traitorous scum that walk among us, and because we have quenched the flames of dissent, a new era can begin in the Pacific.” To mark the occasion, Francos Spain has removed the delegate cap for all governors, allowing them to wear their endorsements as badges of honor and approval. The Twoslist Experiment was deeply saddened by the news. “For six long months, we have seen the number of our agents within the Pacific dwindle, and now, we have no one left to undermine Franco.” Crazy Girl was also distraught, “I WANNA BE DELEGATE! IT’S MY TURN! I won the in-absenteeism election in the NS forums, so I should be the tyrant, er, delegate of the Pacific.” Crazy Girl then went off into a corner and muttered obscenities in Dutch. The fate of the subversives will be left up to Kandarin, delegate of the Rejected Realms. Kandarin announced that these spies, who have failed their mission by being caught, shall be summarily removed from the Anti-NPO cause and banned from the Rejected Realms. After the banning, Kandarin noticed that the spies were still there. Kandarin was shocked to see them on his doorstep. “I banned you! Why are you still here?” One subversive replied “Where were we going to go, Detroit?” As Kandarin sits on his dark throne, with all of his desires tearing upon his mind, our glorious leader was enjoying a celebratory champagne brunch, generously provided by the USSR. Perhaps this overture will lead to a new ally of NPO.
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Piophilia
Liege
Let's get those missiles ready to destroy the universe!
Posts: 48
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Post by Piophilia on Mar 4, 2004 23:45:58 GMT -5
Godly El Sabah Nur to Ascend into HeavenAbove: An artist's rendition of former Savage Lands' righteous ascensionGolgothopolis, NPO: In a shocking turn of events, the Godly El Sabah Nur has decided that he will, in fact, rise into Heaven on Friday morning at 9:00 EST. "Well, I did die to attone for my, errr, for the sins of man, but then I, in my own holy might, was resurrected so that I may spread the divine prophesy of the holy savior: me." stated Nur at a local press conference. "Now, however, my time in this physical realm has ended. I'm officially retiring Friday morning, after which I shall ascend to my rightful place in the cosmos. May Nur be with you." Nur went on to say that his game against the Wizards Thursday evening would be the last of his career. Several weeks ago, Nur's earthly form the Savage Lands Reloaded was crucified by Pacific Army for his brazen display of self-righteousness and support of the NPO. "Yeah, I got crucified pretty bad." stated Nur in an interview with 60 Minutes. "Nails through my hands and everything. Dragged that huge cross-thingie around town for a while. Then I got resurrected in a cave. It was crazy. Err, Praise Nur." El Sabah Nur has spent the time following his resurrection spreading the word of Nur and handing out free Caramel Apple pops. "On the sixth day, God created man. On the seventh, He rested. Then, a little later, He made Caramel Apple Pops." quoted Nur apostle Tar A from the holy scripture. "Nur-damn I love Caramel Apple Pops." When asked his opinion of Nur's ascension, the delegate of Heaven: The Holy Republic of St. Peter's Gate was quoted as saying: "We highly anticipate the arrival of Nur. This season, Heaven has been struggling and a power-hitter like Nur should increase our performance as well as get some asses in those seats. " Heaven recently diverted government funds to pay for the construction of a new stadium to honor the arrival of Nur capable of seating over 50,000 people.
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Sir Paul
Senator / Director of the Pacific Press
This is PNN
Posts: 617
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Post by Sir Paul on Mar 7, 2004 2:26:11 GMT -5
Civil War in the West Pacific [/b] www.imgspot.com/uploads/West_Pacific.gif [/img] left: Political map of the West Pacific / Right: Norion sympathizers defend AnnexLooming Doom, West Pacific: The West Pacific delegate Norion is under attack from within, as the Queendom of Darlin has pulled to within 7 endorsements. The West Pacific, long considered a bastion of enlightenment and democracy, will have its principals put to the test for the first time. Usually, when people challenge the delegacy of the west pacific, they are usually found in violation of some code and deposed of rather quickly and quietly, but Darlin has managed to perform a spectacular sneak attack. She accomplished this by directly telegramming the constituency of the West Pacific and not posting on the regional message board. When asked about such a failure in intelligence, Defense Minister Looming Doom stated that “I am not responsible for invasions from within. It’s my duty to protect from all threats foreign, not domestic! Anyways, I was busy plotting against the NPO. I’m a busy guy, do you know how hard it is to invade them?” It appears that Intelligence Minister Jiredy is squarely to blame for the incidence, and is working around the clock to find a way to defend the delegate seat. “We are using every legal channel and lawyers to eject this threat. We are an honest democracy, and through the process, we can eject any one for anything and still maintain an effective façade of freedom.” On the front, Darlin was observing the battle, and assessed her situation. “We’ve fought a clean, glorious battle. They don’t have shit on us. No war crimes, no sedition, no cause for ejection. The region should be ours by Wednesday. GLORY TO THE PROLETARIATE!” Darlin’s tactics are effective and fast. She targeted new nations, ones that would not inform the West Pacifican government of her endorsements and ambitions. If she is able to keep from being ejected, the regions delegacy should be hers soon. The actions that Norion and the West Pacific Government are under careful international scrutiny. Should Darlin appear in the Rejected Realms, the ambitions and intentions of Norion will be known, and the people of the West Pacific will see the true face of their democracy.
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Sir Paul
Senator / Director of the Pacific Press
This is PNN
Posts: 617
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Post by Sir Paul on Mar 7, 2004 4:14:14 GMT -5
NPO Announces “Get Out the Endorsement” Campaign www.imgspot.com/uploads/rtv_cnn_hm.jpg[/img]PNN is doing their part by targeting new nations Delegate Tab Room, UN Headquarters: Despite the fact that Francos Spain is enjoying his most popularity ever, with 447 endorsements, NPO members are clamoring for more. A new campaign was announced today to try and make Franco the most powerful delegate in the Pacifics. Sir Paul, Governor of the 19th District, publicized this in a speech earlier today. “I am challenging all Governors to contact their constituency. I am challenging all legions and centurions to write to UN members while they are policing the realm. We will not stop until every UN member in the Pacific follows civil code 2005 and becomes aligned with the delegate.” The new program, called “Pacificans Urging Righteous Endorsements,” is taking off with incredible fervor. Intra-Pacific Telegrams are up 27%, and Franco’s endorsements are rising at the rate when he first took office. Despite being well received, Project PURE is not being well received by other regions. The Twoslist Experiment’s always noted Franco’s lack of endorsements as proof that he is not loved. Now, with Franco’s endorsements climbing high, he appears worried. “First off, I can’t think of anything else to say about him, since we are sneakier about our tactics to stay in power. Secondly, every day it becomes harder to invade the Pacific and put our Dutch tyrant Crazy Girl in charge.” With the battle for delegate raging in the West Pacific, it becomes clear that giving the delegate a large amount of endorsements is necessary for the security of a region. Endorsing Francos Spain also gives the Pacific more votes in the UN, and more prestige, helping to disprove the lies that Franco is not loved by his people. Senator Bertram Stantrous noted that “The lies of NetWorkRadio and other subversives must be countered, and the international community must realize that the Pacific loves the NPO.” If you would like to be apart of Project PURE, please help us telegram the 7000+ nations of the Pacific, and encourage them to join the UN and endorse Francos Spain.
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Sir Paul
Senator / Director of the Pacific Press
This is PNN
Posts: 617
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Post by Sir Paul on Mar 15, 2004 15:00:20 GMT -5
Petroleum Panics Pacific www.cnn.com/2000/NATURE/07/19/brazil.spill.wildlife/story.oilybird%20.jpg[/img]A bird being rescued by Halliburton People’s Puppet, The Pacific: Debate rages in the People’s chambers as the Pacific is about to decide the fate of the oil industry in The New Pacific Order. Several environmental groups, energy companies, service companies, and rednecks have testified before the panel, and early polling indicates that drilling may be banned in The New Pacific Order National Parks. David J. O'Reilly, CEO of ChevronTexaco, was dismayed by the news, because his company wanted to help the environment. “There is oil underneath the National Parks in the country! We have to hire a company to extract this dangerous substance from the parks in order to protect nature. If there’s no more oil left in the parks, then the animal and plants can be safe.” Senator Sir Paul agreed. "Usually, when hydrocarbons are present in soils, consultants can be paid as much as $500,000 per year. ChevronTexaco, ExxonMobil, Arco and British Petroleum are all offering to pay the government for the honor of helping the environment and protecting our national parks." Many environmental groups point out that the active extraction of hydrocarbons tends to leave more animals injured than non-action. Greenpeace Planet Project Leader Danielle Hickie noted that “oil is evil! If nature intended for our economies to be run by oil, Gaia would have made it clean-burning and potpourri fresh.” When asked if hydrocarbons should be allowed to make other products, Ms. Hickie vehemently refused. “Our roads should be made of loose gravel or cobblestones, our computers made of granite, our Vaseline made of tree sap, our…” At this point, tree sitter Bob Brown strangled Ms. Hickie to death, because she advocated using any part of a tree for human use. Unfortunately, this tragedy is indicative of the organization's internal struggles. Mr. Brown then announced that fuel-cell technology should be used in place of gasoline, and alternative materials would be discovered to replace asphalt, plastics, nylon, and other petroleum products. Malcolm Keay of the World Coal Institute could not agree more with Greenpeace. “If the world switches to hydrogen power, some one has to make said hydrogen power by pumping electricity into water. Currently, coal provides 23% of the worlds energy needs, and if oil is banned, then coal is the only other viable alternative to produce the massive amounts of hydrogen necessary to power a modern economy.” Indeed, coal is cheap, and the United States has 300 years of coal in its mountains should they ever switch to fuel cells. Although some say wind and solar would pick up the slack where oil leaves off, the entire southwest would have to be covered in solar panels, and most environmental activist don’t like disturbing large tracts of land with human development. Schlumberger CEO Andrew Gould announced he had a compromise that would allow everyone to be happy. “We can drill for oil without rigs being present in the park. Through the miracle of horizontal drilling, we can set up shop on the boarder, go a few miles in, and get some of that oil. Horizontal Drilling in action Whether the People’s Chamber is swayed by these arguments is left to be seen, but one this is for sure, meeting the energy needs of the world will always be a struggle.
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